Engaging in a relationship with a narcissist can be mentally and emotionally draining, primarily because of their unpredictable actions. Their peculiar behaviors, such as gaslighting and love bombing, can present significant challenges.
This article aims to explore some of the weird things covert narcissists do to offer guidance on how to prevent falling victim to their manipulative tactics.
- Attracts with Charms
Enigmatic charm generates a delightful attraction towards something or someone, and it is included in weird things covert narcissists do. The beauty of a person or thing can captivate and fascinate you. However, an enchanting narcissist doesn’t necessarily rely solely on good looks to draw you in. While physical attractiveness can amplify their magnetic appeal, it is not the essence of their charm.
Another way they charm you is by mirroring your qualities, creating a deep connection and rapport. This intense bond occurs when they give you a sense of familiarity or initial safety, as if you’ve known them for a long time. They skillfully tap into your inner world, as if they possess a personalized playlist of your favorite songs, reflecting your desires and preferences to you.
- Love Triangles
Weird things covert narcissists do such as employment of triangulation and harem-building techniques to attract their victims. This involves portraying themselves as incredibly desirable and having numerous options. They create love triangles by frequently mentioning their past partners, previous dates, or individuals who supposedly had an intense infatuation with them.
They might share stories of people actively pursuing them or being excessively flirtatious. Simultaneously, they maintain an appearance of loyalty and devotion towards you, aiming to make you feel unique and valued. However, their behavior also instills a sense of unease, leaving you feeling unsettled and unsure.
- Know Story-Telling Art
Creating stories for their benefit is included in the list of weird things covert narcissists do to woo their victims. Talented narcissists possess remarkable storytelling abilities. They got the ability to construct complex stories and charm you through astonishing facts, trivia, sayings, and epic historical accounts to make you feel overwhelmed.
Naturally, they position themselves as the focal point of these stories, often reshaping the course of history to suit their narratives. These skillful narcissists are far from dull. They have an incessant ability to engage you with fascinating information. I have encountered individuals of this nature and gained incredible insights from them. They too possess a deep understanding of human behaviour, but their intentions are driven by a specific objective.
Their goal is to elevate their power and augment their influence among those in their vicinity. At times, they may embellish their achievements and status. Such instances can be observed across various media platforms, involving politicians, businesspeople, and even actors who are prone to exaggeration and self-promotion.
- Become Believable
Investing significant effort into making their self-created myths believable is some of the weird things covert narcissists do. They arm themselves with information that bolsters their image and may even manipulate numbers to suit their arguments. Their ultimate objective is to ensnare you in their trap. One tactic they employ is the facade of magnanimity. They portray themselves as taking the higher moral ground, seemingly nobler than you, by forgiving your mistakes.
However, this is often a ploy designed to later denigrate or undermine you. I recall an incident where a narcissist entered my office accompanied by their former partner. The narcissist initiated the conversation with a statement like, “I am fully aware of my dysfunctions, and I even consult with my therapist regarding them.
However, could you please assist my former partner, who is incredibly vindictive and mean? I believe this person should undergo an MRI to determine if they have a brain tumor, given their behavioral similarities.” I was astounded by the sheer creativity of this attack. It required careful reading between the lines to discern the feigned tears of the narcissist as they attempted to assume the role of Mother Teresa.
- Amazing Actors
A key characteristic of narcissism is the presence of a wounded and/or insecure inner child within the adult. It is a thing that influences weird things covert narcissists do. To cope and compensate for this, their inner child develops tactics to divert attention and project false appearances. Skilled narcissists have honed their theatrical abilities over many years, effortlessly adapting their roles to suit different situations.
They perceive their very survival to be at stake, which fuels their zealous dedication to protect and perfect their disguises. These theatrical roles encompass a wide spectrum. Some adopt a comedic demeanor, while others strive for a highly “respectable” image. Intimidation may be employed to create distance and elicit admiration or respect, using elements such as leather attire, tattoos, piercings, chains, motorcycles, loud and brash behavior, and more.
Alternatively, they may choose to present themselves as lovable and huggable, akin to a teddy bear. However, with skilled narcissists, it is not straightforward to distinguish between their true selves and the personas they embody. The reason for this complexity is that they genuinely believe they are the personas they have created. In rare moments of transparency and vulnerability, I have encountered narcissists who have admitted to me that they are unsure of their own identity.
Final Words
Dealing with weird things covert narcissists do can pose significant challenges, but it’s important to recognize that you are not alone in facing these issues. Seeking individual counseling or couples therapy can be a valuable step towards finding support and acquiring strategies to safeguard yourself against narcissistic behavior.
Recall yourself that you have the authority to assert control over your life and the relations connected with it and that you are worthy of kind and respectful treatment in return. Appreciating the specific behaviors shown by covert narcissists and learning how to safeguard yourself from them can promote healthy relationships and contented life. If you want to learn more about covert narcissism, then click here.
